Dear Annoying American Girl,
You were sitting behind me at the Canucks game, and I really wish you hadn't been. Unfortunately, your lack of knowledge and ability to read did not stop you from voicing your opinion on basically everything.
Here are some tips that may help prevent fists/drinks/too buttery popcorn from flying in your face at the next game you go to:
1. The guy from Michigan? He's not number 23.
2. There isn't anyone (hot or not) on the team named Bee-es-ka.
3. The crowd isn't saying, 'Boooo' every time Luongo makes a save.
4. The crowd *is* booing the icing being waved off.
5. I don't really care about your friend's room mate who stole from her and is apparently doing coke. Also, just because she's doing coke, it doesn't not stand to reason that the whole Canucks team is doing crack. That's not sound logic.
I encourage people who don't know anything about hockey to go to games. I'm not an expert, but I do know that at some point during the game, it would be nice for the people around you if you just spoke your load opinions a little bit softer, or even took a break for a breath.
Yours truly,
Ursula Hoefer
