Yesterday we met with our fertility specialist.
Basically it went like this (please note, I am paraphrasing portions):
Me: we had planned for this most recent try to be our last time, but I feel cheated from the first go because of the ovarian hyper stimulation, so I don't feel like my body was at 100% effort. When I talked to the nurse, she said there was a problem with my lining, and we should have a meeting with you.
MD: You're crazy to stop. You have amazing embryos. We just need to get the lining under control. Also - have you considered a surrogate?
Us: But it's tough emotionally for us.
MD: You have fantastic eggs. Don't stop. Let's do this plan... (blah, blah, blah & details).
Me: I'm no quitter, and I'm a sucker for punishment! Let's get on the hell-ride of a roller coaster again!
G: Uh oh.
*later*
Me: G, I feel guilty about reneging on our 'last try' promise, but I also feel guilty about not giving you babies. I think my guilt about no babies is more than going back on my promise, so that's that.
G: I don't resent you. Believe me.
Me: Trust no one!
*even later*
Me: You don't think we'll ever buy a boat, do you?
G: Not now.
Me: Well, I have a plan. Let's sell the house, buy a different house, buy a boat, take the extra time to fix it up, and then next summer year, we'll leave on our adventure.
G: (Oh no, what do I do? That's a great idea, but my automatic response is to dismiss her suggestions.) (With a smile) That might work!
And joy abounds.
4 comments:
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